Today, October 15, is National Infant and Pregnancy Loss Remembrance Day, here in the United States of America. If you have been reading for a while, you may remember the story I wrote about Bereaved Mother’s Day that talks about pregnancy and child loss. Today, many families will attend ceremonies which include waves of light, or candlelight ceremonies to remember the pregnancies and infants gone too soon from their lives.
In our little city, we will attend a candlelight ceremony where our children’s names will be read and we can place flowers at the remembrance statue. Our statue, The Angel Of Hope, is one many cities have, that stands in memory of the children who have died. This statue is based on the one in a book called The Christmas Box by Richard Paul Evans. This small book talks about the death of a child and the visit to the grave where this angel statue sits. It isn’t a story of loss only, it is a small book with an inspiring story of remembrance and cherishing the here and now. After this book became popular, people would write the author wanting to know where they could go and visit the statue in the story, in order to mourn their own dead children. Well, there was no physical statue, only in the author’s mind. Afterwards, Richard Paul Evans had a statue commissioned and it was placed in Salt Lake City, Utah and dedicated in 1994. Since then, more than 120 areas have raised money to bring an Angel Of Hope to their town for grieving parents.
This August we reminisced on 6 years without our #2 son. Today, we will join other parents to talk, listen, and spend quiet time at the statue and in fellowship. In many ways, it is an atmosphere of celebration too. There will be cake and living children running around, along with decorating luminaries and families bringing balloons and other trinkets to place at the statue. A local florist provides roses for family members to place every year also. Yet, there will also be sadness throughout the evening. There will be way too many new families in our group, there will be raw feelings and lots of tears. Yet, I am usually refreshed afterwards. It is a unique experience to be comfortable about such a heavy topic with people. Some years this ceremony is just a lovely way to remember our son, other years it is a devastating reminder of our loss. You don’t know where your grief will have you year by year, but I am very appreciative of those in our community who fill this need yearly. Who reach out, through their own grief, to hug the newly grieving every year. I am feeling good and hope I can be a shoulder for those not doing as well this year. Be kind, be gentle, be understanding to all those who grieve in memory today.