Have you ever heard that saying, “If you feel like you might throw up from nerves at the thought of doing it, you are supposed to be doing it!”? Now, that might not actually be the saying but I got the gist of it in there. When you are asked to share your story, when you are starting a new job or business or in my case a book; if you feel like you might just die from nerves, fright, and a general inability to actually do the thing you are supposed to, then you are probably on the right track. Sometimes I find it hard to determine if those feelings are a move in the right direction and you are just nervous. Or is this feeling a red flag waving just trying to warn you of the biggest mistake of your life so far! How can you tell the difference?
I don’t have a really good answer, what I can say is that I am often, as many of you are, the most critical of my self. The work/effort/put your own thing here, never seems to be good enough, but since deciding to write again, what I have found every time I put my words out there, is that someone says something genuinely wonderful about it. And instead of throwing away those words as not meshing with my view of myself, I embrace and cherish every one of them and use them to bolster my lagging self esteem and view of my own gifts. I have watched lovely friends reach out and grab their dreams with both hands and I felt left behind, floundering in a morass of my own making. By starting a blog, sharing my words, and putting pen to paper on novel thoughts, I started climbing out of that sticky muck and embracing more of my authentic self. I hope with every post I can enhance my understanding of my self, my motivation, and my voice. I may not be an award winning author yet, but every sentence I craft leads me closer to the best self of my life. I am lucky to have such honest people around, they tell me when it is good and when it needs help. Sometimes lots of help.
So with that in mind, I have stepped out with pounding heart to join National Novel Writing Month, better known as NaNoWriMo. It is a platform where you and thousands of other writers are encouraged to complete a 50,000 word novel during the month of November. Now, I let the idea that I couldn’t possibly get that done to keep me from trying in the past. Not this year, this year, I have signed up and when this post goes live, I am going to start on the days words. I may not complete a novel, but I know I am going to get better by being involved with other dedicated writers, by habitually writing daily, by asking questions, and listening to answers. I hope your November sees you venturing out to grab your dreams too.